who here is bi or curious because the wife stopped having sex with them?
Return to DiscussionsI'm going to go out on a limb here and reply to this even though its been years ago when I was married for whole year. I was born and raised in the mid-south where everyone was religious and had similar attitudes about sexuality. Sex was done in the privacy of your home with your spouse. Period. Being bi or gay or whatever was either a sin or you were called horrible names and shunned. I knew I was different from an early age so I left there as soon as I could. Even though I've had more sex with men than women I still consider myself bi.
I currently have two married buddies who I see on a regular basis. I introduced one to TS and he is a member now here on TS. We have shared women and men. I have met many other men who have been unsure about the whole "bi" experience and are extremely nervous about their own sexuality. I offer them the opportunity to explore themselves and the experience. No pressure, no touching unless they are completely comfortable with it. I talk to them and ask them questions about what they want to do or what turns them on and what they don't want to do. I only go as far as they are comfortable with. Some have wanted to get a blow job or jack off and go. Only to never be seen again. Some have wanted to go further. Some I'm still seeing. Some have stopped contacting me completely (One guy and I got close enough to that we started texting. Until the wife found our texts and sent me a horrible nasty text. I still think about him and wish him well).
One of my buddies wanted me to meet his wife so that we could play together. I had to ask him a lot of questions regarding her attitude about it. He wasn't sure. I asked him if opening up to the wife about us was worth getting a divorce and was he keeping his college age kids in perspective. Things to consider for sure!
I agree with what some of you have said. Being bi or gay is always there in each of us. Something happens in your life that brings it to focus and we finally act on it. If you're reading this more out of curiosity and not sure if you want to act on it then I suggest taking small steps at first. Talk with someone you trust and know and get those questions answered or that itch scratched. Trust me, you'll know if its right for you or not. I'm here to help you all in anyway I can (lol.) I will gladly suck you or fuck you or jack off on cam with you. I cool if the wife wants to watch as well. Or if you're in my Area and want to meet I'm open for that.
Nude hard hugs to you all,
Rick
Seattle
Yeah, me too doing without pussy. My wife is very dry. She's tried different creams, lubes, nothing works. I like to handle cocks. Look at cocks. Have a cock in my mouth if it's not too big. But I like being on the receiving end too. I'd really like a good blowjob. Something I never get at home. Not even a handjob. If anyone is near Boone, NC and wants to hang out, let me know.
Maybe there is an alternative before you stop having sex with your partner. I have many couples come to me for a massage both m/f and m/m and even some f/f. One sits in a chair and watches while I work on the other. I think sometimes it is important and less forbidding if the wife can "see" her husband get erect under another guy's hands. She is not burdened with satisfying him and there is no hiding and no shame. If she is comfortable with this beginning, we can take it to another level. Often when I work on the man, the female will come over suck my cock, and after it is hard, put it in her spouse's ass. and she will then go to his head and lovingly kiss him while I fuck him. When I work on the women, the men like seeing their wives or girlfriends get really wet and panting. Usually, they'll ask me, at some point, to get on the table and mount her. By the end, as she is nearing orgasm, she will summon her husband over to her and say to him something like "you have got to try his cock" and they will negotiate who will get my load. Whether you do it with a couple that you know or with a sex-positive massage therapist like me I think it is important that you explore this with your spouse in a place that is private and safe and out in the open. One of the most important things I allow people who come see to do is to fail. I won't judge them on how good a cock sucker they are or how good they fuck or how beautiful their body is. They may come and see me again and again for years or this one time on my table may be sufficient to satisfy their curiosity. I'd be happy to answer any questions people may pose about this exploration of sexuality. Let's all be sex-positive. Let's take the shame out of sex.
Hi
Seems like a common problem among males as we age, menopause changes how women feel about sex and what their body can do. I was always Bi curious but really explored further once the sex at home ceased. I don't regret it, I feel a male knows just how to please another male. I don't ever want to lose the desire for sex and if that's the avenue for me then so be it
My sex life with my wife started going away years ago, after her hysterectomy. In the last year or two it's almost nothing. I've been laid a total of three times this year, and I haven't had a blowjob from her in over 8 years. She has straight up told me she has NO interest in sex any more, and on the rare occasion she takes pity on me, she just lays there while I get my rocks off. Relief, but not really fun.
I have always been curious, and have had a few encounters over the years, but now I'm to the point that I'm actively seeking men to play with. Before I would feel guilty as Hell for a long time, but now I don't. I've had two encounters in the last month, and I have absolutely loved them. Without the guilt it makes it so fucking much better. It's like being freed.
My sex life with my wife started going away years ago, after her hysterectomy. In the last year or two it's almost nothing. I've been laid a total of three times this year, and I haven't had a blowjob from her in over 8 years. She has straight up told me she has NO interest in sex any more, and on the rare occasion she takes pity on me, she just lays there while I get my rocks off. Relief, but not really fun.I have always been curious, and have had a few encounters over the years, but now I'm to the point that I'm actively seeking men to play with. Before I would feel guilty as Hell for a long time, but now I don't. I've had two encounters in the last month, and I have absolutely loved them. Without the guilt it makes it so fucking much better. It's like being freed.
I think everyone gets guilty or shame feelings at first or at least I remember that well. I'm glad you broke through that barrier and are embracing it. You're a sexy man who deserves to be cared for sexually and far more than rocks off only. I love you sought out guys. I often attract men in this predicament and I love helping them past it by being the appreciative respectful and sexually focused lover they need in that moment. Because I love to is why. And the best experience will be the fastest way to go past fear and shame.
Add me to this list. It has been over three years now since my wife and I have had sex. Even before, it had become so plain vanilla, almost scripted, that I found more satisfaction in masturbation. In the past two years there has been a rapidly increasing interest in exploring my bi-side. Recently I was invited to join two other married guys to their frequent encounter. That should be starting soon and I'm so ready!
There isn't anyone here who is bisexual because their wife stopped having sex with them. You guys were bisexual all along! Maybe you didn't realize it, or you suppressed it, however another person deciding to not have sex has no bearing on one's own personal sexual orientation. OWN IT!