Candaulism
Definition 1:Candaulism is the practice where a person (usually a man) gets aroused and experiences pleasure when his/her partner is seen naked by others. Another definition includes sex, but for many it only is about sharing photos or having their wife seen naked. Other definition:Candaulism is the practice where a person (male or female) gets aroused and experiences pleasure seeing his/her...
- created by explorer3
Looking at my nude wife
Return to DiscussionsI am exactly the same way. I love it when other men see my wife nude. The first time this happened was when we were dating. We went to the mall so she could try on some new swimsuits. When she neglected to close the curtain all the way, a young man who was waiting for his girlfriend who was also trying on clothes, got to see my wife stark naked in the mirror. It was too late for me to say anything to her. After we left the store, I told her what happened. She smiled and said that she knew and that she had seen him in the mirror looking at her. My wife likes to sunbathe nude and isn't shy about other men seeing her. One time when we were vacationing at Key West, we sunbathed nude on an old wooden dock in front of other people who had their clothes on. My wife would have been about 35 at the time. The dock jutted into the ocean. We had seen one other person who was nude. The person who rented us the chairs said it would be okay. My wife didn't hesitate to take everything off. A couple sitting right next to us appeared to be tourists. They were fully dressed. Another man who had just docked a small boat sat across from us. He had a really nice view. He was dressed too. More recently, I like to watch when another man gives my wife a nude massage. Of course, this is more than just allowing another man to see her naked. But the visual effect when he gets to see my wife completely nude is a thrill for me. One guy blurted to her, "You have a nice body!" She likes the attention. It's all rather innocent though.
Thank you. I didn't know what the word "candaulism" meant until recently. One definition says, "a sexual practice or fantasy in which a man exposes his female partner, or images of her, to other people for their voyeuristic pleasure." I don't think that definition strictly applies to me as it is usually my wife who decides for herself whether she wants to be nude in front of other people. In that sense, I don't "expose" her. I don't know for sure if she was deliberately trying to be an exhibitionist that one time when she sunbathed nude on that old wooden dock in Key West. At least, she didn't say anything to me aferwards admitting that. She is a long-time nudist. I think she just wanted to sunbathe nude. But it was VERY exciting for me because I knew that men who weren't nudists could see her ENTIRE body. The occasions when she received nude massages by guys were, of course, very different. She knew that she was being an exhibitionist and she knew that turned on both me and the other guy. In that case, since the other guy was nude too, it was easier to see his arousal. While I am writing this, there is another incident that I recall. My wife and I were attending a nude swim at a recreation facility that was sponsored by what they call a "non-landed" nudist club. Everyone was nude except for a young man who was an employee of the recreation facility. Anyway, my wife went to the locker room by herself to rinse off for a moment when the employee just happened to walk in. There she was stark naked and all alone while this fellow who was clothed decided to chat with her. She felt very self-conscious and a bit uncomfortable since she didn't know this guy at all. She told me later that he was checking her out, admiring her naked body. This was a HUGE turn on for me when she told me what happened. Of course, it wouldn't have been so funny if anything bad had happened to her.
Really nice to read that anecdote! I don't think it matters a lot if one fulfils the "conditions" to be considered candaulist or not, what really matters is that you both experience the pleasure of exposure to other men. It is great that you can both feel excited and aroused by it, it is a lovely way to share, not only with others but also with one another.
I agree. I've been called a candaulist before; and it doesn't bother me whether I fit the definition or not.
All I know is that I'm very lucky. My wife started out pretty slowly in nudism. At first, she tried to avoid being seen fully naked as much as possible. There was "progress", here and there, especially at a nudist BnB we visited while vacationing. That would be the first time she'd agree to socialize openly naked. There were only a few people there; so she was more comfortable making her first "fully naked appearance." I was very proud of her for that.
The "true test" happened when we visited a "nude-mandatory" resort a year later. This time, she knew it wasn't going to be 2 or 3 couples that would see her naked; but many, many more people. And she was up for the challenge. To my surprise and elation, she wanted to "take the plunge" and be naked everywhere. From the guest house to the pool area, and everywhere in-between, everyone there saw my wife naked. I was "over the moon."
A few years have now passed; and my wife now has no problem being completely naked, around everyone, all day at the resort. She even started shaving bald because she knows people are going to see her naked "up close"; and she wants to look her best, pussy included. I love every minute of it; especially while she's interacting with other nudists.
Where I might fall in the "candaulist" category, is that I did encourage her to sunbathe with her legs open. It first happened during a stay at the BnB. There was no one around; and I proposed it in a jest. To my surprise, she decided to give it a shot. And she really enjoyed it! At our resort there are so many people around that she's more squeamish about it. I obviously can't be pushy; because then she'll figure I'm "setting her up" lol! We've actually talked about it (I want to make sure she's always comfortable); and she's confided that she's not overly concerned about her exposed vulva being seen; but only selectively by a friend (whom she figures has seen "it" anyway), or from afar. So I KNOW that by focusing on having friends at the resort and spending a lot of time around them; she is going to "naturally" be more relaxed and comfortable with them seeing her legs open/bent over, etc... Last year we were all (3 couples) reclining in a semi-circle just chatting and drinking. One of our friends was lounging with her legs open. I looked over at my wife; and sure enough, her legs were open and her pussy also in full view. Seeing her express that kind of confidence and willingness to be fully exposed is just...beautiful. And as long as she'd comfortable with it; I'm happy.
Maybe that makes me a candaulist lol!
Last year we were all (3 couples) reclining in a semi-circle just chatting and drinking. One of our friends was lounging with her legs open. I looked over at my wife; and sure enough, her legs were open and her pussy also in full view. Seeing her express that kind of confidence and willingness to be fully exposed is just...beautiful. And as long as she'd comfortable with it; I'm happy.Maybe that makes me a candaulist lol!
Yes. You are a candaulist. LOL. Seriously, there's no point in getting too hung up about the definition. As long as your wife enjoys showing herself, why shouldn't you be proud and happy?
My wife and I have belonged to the same nudist club for years. While she is usually rather discreet about showing too much, I have observed that. like your wife, if a female friend is sunbathing across from her with her legs open, my wife may be more inclined to do the same. It's almost as if she has received a cue that it's okay for her to let down her guard and be a bit more daring. It's similar to when we attend the dances. They are clothing optional. She usually won't go completely nude until at least one of the other women does. Then she'll strip off her clothes and stay that way. If she sees other couples slow dancing while nude, she'll want to do the same with me. Later in the evening, when the atmosphere at the dance is more "laid back", she may become less inhibited. But, again, she doesn't want to be the only woman on the dance floor doing that.
Occasionally, when we're at a dance, she may turn her chair so that she can chat with a guy who is sitting at the table behind us. In that case, he will have a very nice view of the front of her nude body. They both will have had a couple of drinks by then. I notice that if she likes the person, she might casually open her legs a bit more than usual. She is less self-conscious because of the alcohol (it only takes a couple of glasses of wine) but also because she knows that the person isn't going to disapprove. It gives me a lot of pleasure knowing that my wife is so confident.
While she is usually rather discreet about showing too much, I have observed that. like your wife, if a female friend is sunbathing across from her with her legs open, my wife may be more inclined to do the same. It's almost as if she has received a cue that it's okay for her to let down her guard and be a bit more daring.
On a side note: yes, over the years I've seen women "emboldened" while socializing with "bolder" nudist women.
One of the most memorable times I've seen it happen was while still with my first wife; who fell under the "bold" category. A couple sat next to us at a nudist venue; and it was clear right away that the wife was very shy and closed off. The husband walked off to meet up with some people he knew. And my wife struck a conversation with the woman; and the two of them "hit it off." My wife, of course, was lounging with her legs open; and I could see the woman eyeballing her from time to time. I walked off for a bit myself; and when I came back, the woman was sitting back - relaxed...legs open! Her husband came back around a shortly later; and the expression on his face was absolutely priceless. It was a mixture of disbelief and amazement lol! His wife sitting next to mine; both of them pussy exposed!
It's not hard to explain. It's simply "if she can do it, I can get away with it too." A lot of where my (current) wife is today - in regards to social nudity - can simply be explained by her observing other nudist women she's socialized with. Especially the "bolder" ones.
On a side note: yes, over the years I've seen women "emboldened" while socializing with "bolder" nudist women...It's not hard to explain. It's simply "if she can do it, I can get away with it too." A lot of where my (current) wife is today - in regards to social nudity - can simply be explained by her observing other nudist women she's socialized with. Especially the "bolder" ones.
I think that there are a number of factors that enable my wife to show herself more freely at our nudist club. Her being "emboldened" while socializing with "bolder" nudist women is only one factor. Are there members present who will make a complaint? Is the management strict or more laid back? Are we at a dance or just sunbathing at the pool?
There have been a few times when my wife has taken me totally by surprise. A few years ago, we were at a dance when she suddenly decided to shake her bare boobs at me. I was sitting in a chair while she stood in front of me. I was very concerned that she was going to get us in trouble as I knew that other members had been disciplined in the past for similar behavior. Fortunately, no one complained. In fact, one of the other guys came over and told us how much he enjoyed watching her. It was very uncharacteristic for my wife to behave that way. She did have a couple of glasses of wine, but I don't think I can fully blame her behavior on the alcohol.
Are there members present who will make a complaint? Is the management strict or more laid back? Are we at a dance or just sunbathing at the pool?
A very fair point.
A swinger's resort is going to be different from an "adult-oriented" venue; which is going to be different from a "family-oriented" resort. The "nudist etiquette" can vary greatly between locations. Sometimes even between times of the day - as alcohol might become more involved "after dark."
I used to belong to a non-landed club that was ruled by its owner with an iron hand. She was a stickler for nudist etiquette; and she considered open-legged for women to be "unladylike." It was ironically almost repressive; and we didn't last there very long.
My wife and I visited different resorts before settling on our current one. At one, almost no one was naked outside the pool area, and people weren't very social in the pool area. I used to chat with a nudist penpal - and fellow candaulist - who went to a similar-type resort and was very frustrated about it. Due to all the women covering up outside the pool area, and the fairly conservative "tone" of the resort, his wife became less and less amenable to being openly naked. Very few women - except for the true exhibitionists - are going to be willing to take a chance and be the only woman being openly naked. Unfortunately for him, that was the only resort within a reasonable distance.
For the fellow candaulists interested in social nudism out there, I would recommend visiting several venues (if possible). Take a look around, and see how many people are openly naked and how many women are sunbathing open-legged. If you can't see anyone "open and free", it is likely going to be a "G-rated" environment where your wife will probably not be comfortable being "open and free."
Perhaps because it is "nude-mandatory"; I noticed a very different "tone" at our current resort right away. Not quite as "open and free" as the BnB we visited; but close enough. They have outdoors co-ed naked Yoga there every weekend; so we clearly saw that "fully exposed" was definitely not frowned upon there. Seeing this, my wife saw no reason to be coy about being openly naked there. And that's what I suppose every candaulist wants; for his wife to be comfortable being seen completely naked!
For the fellow candaulists interested in social nudism out there, I would recommend visiting several venues (if possible).
I agree with your recommendation. My wife and I have been to a number of nudist clubs and they are all different in terms of how strictly they enforce "proper" nudist etiquette. If you are fortunate enough to have a club nearby but it is too conservative, then try visiting different clubs while on vacation.
I recall one rustic nudist camp that was rather laid back. My wife would sunbathe nude next to the few other visitors and not need to be concerned as to whether she was showing too much. On the other hand, there was another rustic camp that we used to go to where the owner was a stickler for making sure that people abided by the rules.
Also consider the ownership of a club. The two rustic clubs were each owned by a single person. If the owner isn't too concerned about relatively minor transgressions, then you can relax. If the owner is strict, then you need to be more careful. If the club is a coop that is run by an elected board, the situation may vary from year to year depending upon who is in office. The club that we belong to now is a coop.
The same reasoning applies to non-landed nudist clubs. My wife and I used to belong to a non-landed club that was run by a married couple. They were very strict about how their members behaved. After that club dissolved, another non-landed club came into existence. It was a coop. That club was a lot more laid back.
Years ago, my wife and I danced nude at a nudist resort when we were on vacation. We were kind of shocked at how many people were dancing nude because at that time the club near where we lived was more conservative. I also think that the sense of anonymity while vacationing away from home enabled my wife to feel less inhibited.