Confused

Is it the same female you have played with before? Could it be that you seemed to be enjoyed the other female a lot more this time around and not realise it? Maybe he was just in a mood and had one of those days. Its been a couple of days since you posted this so l hope you had a chance to talk more about it

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Yup,
we need more details. Was it the same women, how is the age difference, how much were you involved compared to him., and was she his type and not just yours?
A lot to figure out here but don't give up.
Later,

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My boyfriend and I have been in the lifestyle for 1 Year now. We are only girl girl play and same room sex. Recently I have been exploring more and wanting him to touch the female but we are still very very soft. We have had a lot of experiences where he loves to watch me with a woman but last night he got bothered. He went to sleep and said he felt neglected. He was upset and said I did not pay attention to him. I dont understand why he felt this way if we have done this several times. Please help. I feel bad but I did not break any rules and this was not our first rodeo. What happened to him?

He felt excluded and insecure because it's always hard to know how you will react to any given situation. What is important here is that if the rules you agreed on were followed, you all did nothing wrong. But rules don't guarantee no hurt feelings, they just help to mitigate. What I suggest is asking him if he can talk about why he felt left out and alone with the idea that you aren't going to get defensive and he isn't going to accuse you or her. I statements when talking about feelings are important. It avoids he said she said she said and so on. If he cannot say why, ask what he would like you to do to help make it better. If he asks for sorry, say how about intimacy and inclusion, that's what you are missing. If he gets really defensive then it's deeper in his psyche and maybe you won't talk it out in one go.

Here is my rule. When there is a guest, and we are playing with them, we agree to not be emotional about our jealousy, anger, pain, whatever in front of the guest. That includes dropping out without making it smooth. I would sit off and spread and watch, engage the guest's eyes and smile if I was less into it, or feeling off. That is still connection and encouragement and it's fakeable if need be. Men also don't handle not being the center of attention well sometimes, and there is always a possibility when two play to use the body and the eyes especially to reach out and acknowledge the other while connecting, it helps. I have also had thirds who shoot nasty looks and get silly about my man inside them and the first time I may have pitched a fit, but after that I just was extra nice to them afterwards and thanked them for pleasuring him so well. Honestly. They never came back.

So what after, well, if someone is hurting the rule was fix it. If someone didn't come, get them off or best effort. Also know to wind down things sooner rather than later, and this is hard because sometimes you will be having lots of fun and may have been very supportive in his fun before or vice versa but its so important not to play the what I got game AFTER. If one of us had a want unfulfilled from last time we would ask for that to happen and the other would try to make it happen, that helps to build trust and security and also means the ability to put off feeling bad and getting upset because you know there is a way to address it positively later. It took me three years to get rid of jealousy and envy or insecurity. Now I have no issues with a lover doing anything with another, but I don't always choose to go in for three either, regulars I have been in another room doing work or relaxing. I let them know they are here to have fun with him not to worry about me, and not to feel any discomfort, we both invited you here.

Ultimately I think this kind of play is super helpful for growth but not for everyone. I hope it gets resolved for you both and you continue to grow.

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