Is swinging the best choice for me? (Single male seeking MF for threesome)

Hi, I'm a newbie to this site. The reason I joined is that I recently switched my sexual identity from gay to bi after a couple experimental hookups with women. After hearing accounts of other gay guys' past sexual experiences with women, I KNEW I had to experience it myself, so I did what I had to to find out (i.e. messaging dozens of women on OKCupid with a "Will You Show Me The Ropes?" message).
But now that I know I'm interested in both men and women, my next objective is to experience a full-blown MMF bisexual threesome. The trouble is, I don't know which "dating subculture" is best geared for me finding what I want. I tried messaging a ton of gay and bi guys on OKC to see if any of them might be up for a mixed three-way in the future, but I've had essentially no luck so far. So I've come to the conclusion that an MF bi couple might be the easiest way forward, rather than finding the man and the woman separately.
The only prerequisite I have is for the man to have past experience with men (so he knows what he's doing), and for him to be openly bisexual rather than DL or "discreet." Also I'm too poor to invest much $$$ in
But I'm not really sure if the swinger culture is the proper choice for me. I've heard that it can be really tough for single men to get going in the community; specifically, that you have to put in a lot of "social leg work" for an extended time, complete with an expect-nothing attitude, before anything happens. I've also heard that single male swingers tended to be inherently relegated to a "subordinate" power position (i.e. bottom of the totem pole). As a proud libertarian socialist, I deeply resent hierarchical power structures, and would be unhappy in a culture that expects me to "know my place".
As a single bisexual male seeking a threesome, would I have to patiently bow down to the power structure for months, in order to find what I want in a swinger scene? And if not swinging, what are some other scenes/apps that would get me what I wanted with less time and less sweat?

• Flag
• Edit
• Delete
• Quote
• Reply