Its taken me all my life to realise im Bisexual
I've been bi all my life, living in the shadows of secret desires, is this a punishment for something I have done in a past life.
I've found it so hard to scratch the ich I wonder if there is someone else that feels the same way, I'm in a relationship with a woman that's so straight, I can't tell her how i feel, if she was smart about it she could have as many cocks as she likes, but I still like woman as well, a bi woman would be great, I sometimes think about what we could do together.
How does any one else survive with these urges.
Yes I have had that problem too. Knew I wanted more than my lovely lady and thought I needed it from her. But no, I need the thrill of exposing myself to guys, dancing in panties and stockings and doing what they ask of me......all on line on Skype of course! Have been to clubs and there I am the top guy, wanting my cock sucked and really enjoying shooting down a hungry throat. But on-line my mixed sex comes out and I am often such a slut!!! I love it, and do it a lot. Wanked on here today for about eight guys......loved it!
The urges don't go away. You're not being punished. How you navigate this is your choice. The poster after has his strategy. Many people use the internet to explore without the perils of the flesh so to speak. However, this can over time be just as damaging to a relationship as infidelity. It's about balance and honesty.
Now to the idea you can't tell her. Well of course you can. You're choosing not to. Those reasons can be more or less good, and I don't know what they are but you do. Excluding a partner may be necessary for growth. It's still exclusion and when and if you grow beyond her, she has no way to catch up. Think about being honest with her and let go of some anguish.
i agree. Its important to be honest about who you are and what you want, with your partner. Acting on it is an entirely separate issue. Infidelity is the same whether its with another woman or another man. Acknowledging what you want And what turns you on is important but acting on it needs to be something that both of you agree to, if you value the relationship. The one option that should not be on the table is keeping it secret. It prevents you from being your authentic self, creates resentments and guilt, and corrodes the relationship. Why is honesty so hard? Because you cant control the outcome. That scares the crap out of most people. Its the lack of an ability to control the outcome that scares us, not the honesty itself.
No one outside unless they are really, really malicious or mean breaks up a relationship. There is often focus or blame placed on a deed, or an individual, but the reality is that relationships start to fall apart well before any infidelity or similar event occur. Some of us manage with the burdens of secret exploration, others do not. What I do know is that when deep shame and insecurity are part of it, the secret eats at the person and ends up making them reckless. I saw it in myself, and I have seen it in countless friends and men I know. The thing is when I said "consider telling her", that wasn't me saying "tell her". It means really think it through, rather than just avoiding it. At best, the person realizes their partner is much more capable than they thought, at worst, it ends a relationship, but both are not possible, and the truth is usually somewhere in between (thinking it through carefully helps to show where the truth might lie). I have seen all the possible outcomes in my life, and have been surprised, pleasantly at some.
The key is really to make decisions about exploring carefully, safely and with as little regret as possible. I'm not telling any man to be gay, or to be bi, or to cheat, or anything. What I hope is that guys seeking answers find them as easily and smoothly as possible. So they can make their own decisions. You're a remarkable exception in that I have not met a man who has had the awakening you have. That's a beautiful thing indeed, but I would venture you are unique in your openness and growth. BTW my rule of thumb with married guys is that if I don't know then that is obviously fine, if I do, then one time is OK, repeats are not, if the wife knows or bf knows great and if they are present and involved, perfect!
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